Hoi!! do me a favour

They changed our local Palais
Into a bowling alley
And fings ain't what they used t' be

There's Teds with drainpipe trousers
And Debs in coffee houses
And fings ain't what they used t' be

There used to be Trams not very quick
Gotcha from place to place
But now there's just jams 'alf a mile thick
Stay in the human race
I'm walking

They stuck parking meters
Outside our doors to greet us
Now Fings ain't what they used t' be

Corr! monkeys fFlying round the moon
We'll be up there with 'em soon
Fings ain't what they used t' be

Once our beer was frothy
But now its frothy coffee, well
Fings ain't what they used t'be

It used to be fun Dad an' old Mum
Paddling down Southend
But now it ain't done
Never mind chum
Paris is where we spend our outin's

Grandma tries to shock us all
Doing knees up rock 'n' roll
Fings ain't wot they used t' be

We used to have stars
Singers who sung a Dixie melody
They're buying guitars, plinkty plonk
Backing their selves wiv three chords only

Once we'd dance from 12 to 3
I've got news for Elvis P
Fings ain't what they used to
There's a lot we used to
Fings ain't what they used to be
